Good for you.  Because this movie bored me to DEATH. 

Pulse is it’s name.  I was with my girlfriends and we wanted to watch something really scary.  After scrolling through ROD uninspired (Bunnyman: a tale of a murderous man in a bunny suit.  Does cinema like this actually exist?) , we discovered Pulse; it seemed decent enough.  Black, stringly hair dangling in front of pale faces, Kristen Bell (who watched Veronica Mars?  Who loved it as much as I did?  LOGAN ECHOLLS FOR EVER even if he is batcrap crazy…), Ian Somerhalder (Vampire Diaries.  Nuff said.), creatures that look like Lord Voldemort with eight arms…what more could you ask for?  It’s not like there is a lot of selection for a group of girls that have seen all the classics, so we hit PURCHASE content that perhaps we had found a suitable way to waste 2 hours.

We really hadn’t.  I’m serious when I say the only part of the entire movie I enjoyed was seeing Octavia Spencer as the tenant for the building (don’t you love that?  Don’t you love just screaming at your TV THAT’S THE WOMAN FROM THE HELP! and picturing her in her beautiful dress she wore to the Oscars?).  I actually can’t give a synopsis because a) it made no sense and b) I am trying, very hard, to block all memory of this terrible flick from my head before it corrupts me and I start to like Highlander.  But I’ll give you this, because it’s what’s rolling around inside my now numb shell of a brain (it’s the hashtag/brainstorm version of the movie): duct tape, computers taking over the world, washing machines, old guy, books, old guy, cable, USB.

It made me afraid of COMPUTERS.  HOW?!!!??

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